Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Pulling the plug on the bullshit (before somebody puts an eye out)

Over at the Emerson LaSalle entry at wikipedia.org there has been a lot of discussion about whether or not LaSalle is a hoax and if the entry should be deleted. They claim Emerson LaSalle might not be real.

Uh ... duh.

Really, wasn't it sort of obvious? Did anyone think this was a serious attempt to fool anyone? I mean, maybe for a second until people think, "No way." I've gotten dozens of e-mails asking something like, "Hey, you're just screwing with us, right?" And I always write back and say, "yeah it's just a goof" or words to that effect. A number of people have also noticed that photos of LaSalle have really been pictures of Irish author James Joyce. Most people enjoyed playing along and totally "got it."

I appreciate all of the people who have been in on the joke. Believe it or not, I didn't create the LaSalle wikipedia entry or the entries on GoodReads.com, nor did I write all of the "scholarship" and "tributes" that appears on other blogs and web pages. I'm only responsible for what's appeared on this blog. Basically this started with a lot of people having fun and pretending. But now this hoax business is apparently endangering our American way of life. It's time to stop the madness.

More to the point, I don't want the fun goof of a fake LaSalle to distract from the very real news that Jake Dickey at Explosive Entertainment Motion Pictures has optioned PULP BOY, the screenplay I've co-written with Anthony Neil Smith. This news, at least, is very very real, and Neil and I are very happy that Mr. Dickey gets the character, story and style of humor. I'll post further film news as things happen. (And it's real. I mentioned that, right?)

So, just to be very clear, Emerson LaSalle is not any more real than Big Foot or Santa Clause or James Patterson. (But the film news is real.)

24 comments:

Neil said...

But...but...but...

It was *you* pretending on those phone calls! And those meetings about the script Em had to have in dark parking garages? Now I get it.

I am SHOCKED, sir. SHOCKED.

Karen Olson said...

Why do I find it sad that you had to post this?

John D said...

Not real?!?! But I just bought his whole backlist from some guy on ebay! Dammit! Now I have to see if I can get my $852.89 back.

Bill Crider said...

Dammit, I'm crushed. You bastards have fooled me for the last time! (And I'm not refunding JohnD's money, either!)

Graham Powell said...

You're kidding, right? It's this post that's fake, right? RIGHT???

pattinase (abbott) said...

Every once in a while, I need to believe in Emerson LaSalle. So don't jerk him out of my universe. I'm content that his existence be questionable.

Victor Gischler said...

Pattinase,

Emerson will live in in all of our hearts. (And hopefully on screen.)

VG

David Cranmer said...

Some folks will never get it. Sadly, quite often it's the majority.

eviljwinter said...

I once saw Emerson LaSalle in the woods of West Virginia.

Yes, he does crap in the woods.

And on Jim Thompson's birthday, if your good, Emerson will come down the chimney with his brothers Lake LaSalle and Palmer LaSalle (cousin Powell LaSalle is out front with the car cranking up Tom Waits and Whitesnake and drinking Colt 45) will come down your chimney, have sex with your wife, and leave cold beer in your fridge. Don't forget to leave him booze and hash brownies.

Patrick Shawn Bagley said...

Toward the end of BITTER WATER BLUES, I have Joey Kotex kill a guy for suggesting that there never was an Emerson LaSalle.

With a pulp hook.

Victor Gischler said...

That's awesome, Bagley. But now it looks like I'm in danger of that hook myself.

VG

Duane Swierczynski said...

I just threw up a little bit of my soul into my mouth.

Long live Mr. LaSalle.

Jerry House said...

My word verification is CABLE, which is where Emerson shouold have a series once (and if) the movie franchise should die out

Jeff Shelby said...

This is both hilarious and perhaps the saddest thing I've ever read.

J. Dickey said...

This happened a lot sooner that I thought it would.

Perhaps we ought to call LaSalle's family and the people over at the LaSalle Foundation to let them know.

SD said...

Amazing that none of these people ever managed to notice the fact that "Emerson LaSalle" is obviously an anagram for "No Smella Le Arses."

Victor Gischler said...

It looks like the wiki entry has been corrected to reflect LaSalle's fictional status. So maybe no problem now ...

MysterLynch said...

I feel so used.

I am going to go drink and listen to my copy of Spinal Tap's Heavy Metal Memories.

Victor Gischler said...

Oops. I spoke too soon. It looked like the powers at wikipedia were about to accept the changes to the entry, but a verdict of "not good enough" seems to be in the pipe. Geez, why don't they just take the thing down already? These mofos are slower than congress.

VG

jeff-h said...

What a bummer that you had to write a post that spills the beans.

So who's the first volunteer to travel back in time and publish pulp novels under the name Emerson LaSalle so we can make the Wikipedia entry "good enough"?

AnswerGirl said...

Wait, wait, wait ... Santa? Santa's not real? What are you saying here?

Victor Gischler said...

AnswerGirl,

Oh, Santa is real. But ... you don't want to knw the REAL reason he comes down your chimney in the middle of the night.

VG

JayW said...

Ditto what Karen said - I was hoping that you'd keep the mystery going forever and never admit that it was all made up. Eventually, he might have actually risen via the legend!

Oh well - all good ideas eventually are blown up these days...

Nathan Cain said...

I own a complete set of LaSalle first editions. He can't be a hoax.